A boring update from me. But boring is good right now. No drama, everything is good. I think going through infertility got me used to the crazy ups and downs of life. But I like boring and predictable now. I update you all on Q and S’s 6 month appt: they are huge. I also talk about my feelings on immune issues and infertility. In the end, I make a plea for you all to leave me some comments on the directions this podcast should go. I can’t podcast super frequently so I want to make the most out of each episode. Thanks to all of you who have continued to listen.

A long time no podcast? I catch everyone up on the past month, which has included teeth, solids, and sleep training.

I also end the podcast with tips for moms of multiples--both those who are expecting and those with new babies. Hopefully they're helpful to those of you out there with twins--and singletons, and triplets, etc.

Another quick post from me. Always hard to find time but the kiddos had a longish nap today so that gave me a bit of a break. On this episode, I talk about how fast a year can fly by and how it is strange to look back on the years of IF--especially when I have them all recorded.

Sorry for the long delay. It's getting harder and harder to podcast. The babies take up a lot of time--who would have thought? I talk on this podcast about my big babies (who are measuring at or above the 75th percentile for height and weight for 4 month olds--and that's unadjusted!), getting back to work, and getting out and being more social. And I'm finally starting to admit that maybe I'm a mother.

Back from a week long trip to the beach. It went well and was a nice break. Kiddos were great. Just a quick post this week. I talk about my thank you note to my doc, my upcoming visit from my MIL, and upcoming interviews with nannies. Feeling woefully behind on my dissertation and hope to get some work done on it soon! And here's a pic of our 2 bathing beauties taking a nap.

A quick podcast today. You get to hear some babies fussing in the the background. Hard to get through doing anything these days. But I still think we were very lucky to get 2 pretty easy going babies. I talk this week about my mom's helpful visit and our upcoming trip to the beach. Yay, I finally get to travel. I also talk about how I am making it out of the house more with babies in tow. They're pretty good when I've gone out and it really helps my state of mind to leave the house every once in awhile. And here's a pic of our nursery. It looks kind of messy a lot of the times but you can see the cribs for our little monkey (Q) and our little moon (Sab--ine).

I talk this week about the scares of being a parent--how seeing your child hurt kills you. I also talk this week about sending thank you notes to your IF care providers and visits from the moms (my mom and MIL). And here's a pic for you to enjoy: Sab--ine giving her best WTF look to her brother.

Feeling better this week. Got some sleep and have a little light at the end of the tunnel: my mom comes in 1.5 weeks! Yay! I talk this week about hoping for longer sleep stretches and still not feeling like a mother. Still on smile watch. Think it'll be any day now that we start getting some real smiles and giggles!

I can't believe it. Both babies are asleep. So I have a quick second to upload this podcast. I get a little weepy in this one so I apologize in advance. I am mentally and physically drained and it's hard to believe I have months and months of this draining work ahead of me. But I know it gets easier and more rewarding. And a sleepless night with twins is still tons better than a sleepless night crying over a failed cycle. It's been hard to podcast because every free moment (and there are very few of them) have to be spent doing dishes, laundry, and getting work done on my dissertation.
This week I talk about how hard it was to have a babysitter look after my kids (even though I was still in the house) and how I really miss my husband--even though he's still in the house too. :)

Welcome to my 100th episode! Who knew I'd be at this for 100 episodes? When I started, I was just beginning doing injectables and figured I'd be pregnant in no time! This week I talk about still feeling broken--breastfeeding is not going well at all. I also talk about how motherhood (and getting your PhD at the same time) leads you to feel like you have a case of the should be's (as in I should be...holding the babies, working on my dissertation, doing laundry, etc.). But I am blessed with 2 good babies who are the light of my life. Look at how snuggly they are!

How did those 2 babies fit in my belly? Here's a pic of how they were positioned in the womb. So long time no podcast, huh? It's been a crazy few weeks. This week I give you the audio version of the birth story and talk about the trauma with feeding issues. If I sound a bit incoherent, it's because I'm on no sleep right now. It gets better right? :)
No matter how little sleep I'm getting though, I still love these 2 sweet babies we've brought home. It's the first mother's day where I can avoid spending the day feeling so sad.

So sorry for the delay in posting. Thanks to everyone for the well wishes. It may take me a little while to post a podcast but I hope to do it soon. But I'll give the summary here. Because I was strapped to the bed with a zillion different wires, I wasn't able to move around and help labor along.  stayed at 6cm for awhile. Finally, things started to pick up a bit. I really wanted to get things going before 5pm so I knew m doc could be there to deliver me. Low and behold by about 4pm, I was about 10cm. We were in a regular L&D room but my doc told me to start pushing there. It was so amazing to reach that point. I was actually going to give birth! I was pushing well and making progress fast. My doc was worried because Quen--tin (the presenting baby) was showing some signs to distress during contractions. So they wheeled me into the OR. It was crazy in there! There were about 20 people in this small room. They got me situated on the table and I started pushing again. They used a vacuum on Q's head to make sure he was delivered fast. A few more pushes and he was out. It was an amazing moment to look down and watch this baby coming out of me. I honestly thought someone would tell me I was pregnant with monkeys or something. :) They whisked Q away to another room and then they started with the breech extraction of Sab--ine. That was crazy and nerve racking. It seemed to take forever for the doctor to find Sab--ine and pull her out. But they finally got her out with some pushing from me. Then they took her to a spot next to me and I tried to take a peek as they worked on her. As soon as I heard her cry it made me bawl like crazy. They delivered the placentas and stitched me up a bit. We were shocked when we found out that Q was 5lbs 11oz and Sab--ine was 5lbs 6oz. We were also amazed that they needed no NICU time and came home with me. I'll give the full details at the next podcast but just have to say how amazingly blessed we feel and totally in love.

Contrax started to get stronger so they took me up to L&D. As soon as I got up here, my water broke--huge gush! I was already 5 cm and in a lot of pain, so I got the epidural.  I haven't progressed much -- they started pitocin and at last check I was about 6 cm.  We're going to attempt a vaginal delivery, but it will be in the OR just in case.  We'll keep everyone posted!

Thanks, everyone, so much for your kind thoughts and encouraging words!  It means a lot.

So now it seems I may be contracting regularly. I'm 35w2d today. Really wanted to hold on to these babies at least until 36 weeks but they may have other plans. I'll keep you posted.

Sorry no podcast yet. It's hard to podcast from the hospital and I've been feeling pretty tired all the time. So the update thus far is that I was here until Thursday when the doc's felt it was safe to discharge me. BP was steady, labs were steady, etc. But as soon as I got home and started monitoring BP there, my BP was running around 140/90. So not good. Went in the next day for my appointment but being the realistic pessimist that I am, I brought my packed bag with me. And it was good that I did. BP was running high so doc felt it best to just admit me for the duration of the pregnancy. Good news is we did an ultrasound to check fluid levels and do a doppler on the blood flow in the umbilical cords and all looked well with the babies. So at least my stupid issues aren't hurting them.

Doc says we won't go past 37 weeks but he's skeptical I'll make it that far. I have a countdown going on my white board in my room that the RNs update for me each day. Right now, we're at 35w1d, 13 days to go until 37 weeks.

I am going to try and podcast tomorrow with more updates and info. Thanks to everyone for their kind comments. It's nice to know I have company while I'm holed up in the hospital. :)

Although BP is good and nothing has worsened, my doc is keeping me here at least until tomorrow. We'll run more labs then and we'll see. I'm not going to hold my breath. But I'm 34w5d so getting really close to 35 weeks. My husband and I took a tour of the NICU yesterday. It was comforting in that there are really very few 34 weekers in there. But we did see a few babies who were born before 34 weeks and were at 34 weeks gestational age. They all weighed about 4.5 lbs. Even though our 32 weeks u/s said our babies were 4.5 lbs already, they tend to be off. But wow, those 4.5lbs babies were so tiny. It was nice to have a visual of what's inside of me but also scary to see how small our babies are. I just hope I can grow them for a few more weeks.

Greetings from the hospital. I'm here being monitored for preeclampsia. Seems I have a mild form and am waiting until tomorrow to see my doc and figure out if I'll stay here until delivery or go home for bed rest. So hoping to go home but we'll see. The babies seem to be doing well and my BP has remained below normal. But I'm spilling protein. So a not-so-fancy podcast this week since I am not at my usual computer. But hey, you can't beat wireless in the hospital. Will try and update with blog posts this week. I am 34w2d today so every day counts now.

Back from a 2 week hiatus. Things are still going well. Still sleepy as all get out and have the craziest cankles you've ever seen but so thrilled to still be pregnant. I talk this week about another trip in to see the doctor--this time for cramping. And I also talk about the emotional mess I wanted to become at today's baby shower.

Mother in law and sister in law (not the mean one) :) are headed into town so no time for a podcast today. Will try and update soon though. But for now, just know we had a great appointment today. Both babies are measuring pretty equally and are both about 4.5 lbs. No wonder why it's getting so hard to walk around. Enjoy this pick of our little girl yawning. She's tired just like her mommy.

31 weeks today! Who knew growing 2 babies would make me so tired? I talk this week about how tired I've been and how things are moving along: nursery is getting assembled, childbirth and baby care classes are being taken, strollers are being purchased. It's like I'm actually starting to believe that I might just have 2 little ones arriving my way in a few more weeks.

Another trip to L&D this week and yet again, all is OK. NO more trips though--seriously. Unless I'm actually giving birth to these babies, I'm not going. I talk this week about trying to cut back on work and the fact that you still deal with hurtful comments related to IF even after you've been pg for awhile. Tonight is the garage sale for one of the local MoMs groups. Excited to finally be purchasing some things--hopefully my wallet won't hurt too much afterwards!

A relatively uneventful week. No trips to the L&D so that's good. Husband was gone all week but was supposed to arrive tonight. Flight got cancelled so he's coming in tomorrow. Bummed about that but oh well. I talk this week about feeling faint all the time, having good friends, and havinga  great ultrasound. Babies are both getting big: boy is 3 lbs and girl is 2lbs 14oz. Both are around teh 50th percentile. Hooray. here's a shot of the boy, We seem to get the best shots of him.

I'm in the 3rd trimester. Yay! Never thought I'd make it here. This week was another bumpy ride complete with a passing out episode at the dentist and another trip to L&D. But all is well. Went back to the dentist where they let me sit up (vs. lie down) and the contractions I was having again don't seem to be chipping away at my cervix. Energy level though is at an all time low and my ability to move seems to get more and more restricted every day. But each little kick I get is a nudge from the babies to keep on chugging and I'll do it until they're ready to come out.

I'm at 26 weeks now. Had a scare yesterday with a trip to Labor and Delivery. All is well. Just was having some braxton-hicks contractions that were coming regularly. I talk this week about how your expectations change when you go through IF and how it stinks to be so immobile sometimes.

Not much going on this week--which is always good. I'm 25 weeks and chugging away. I talk this week about the debt IF still plays in our lives and how buying crib bedding was the scariest thing I've ever done. But see the pic? I finally did it. Hopefully this will open the flood gates of me being less of a freak and more like a normal pg woman--who wants to buy a zillion things!

Well I made it to my first big goal--24 weeks, viability. I talk this week about my 24-week appointment and u/s. There's a cool shot of our baby boy there. I also talk about how my day of pampering didn't go quite as planned and how I've been flooded with emotion since hitting 24 weeks. The countdown continues. Next stop: 27 weeks and the 3rd trimester.

Week 23 here for me. I'm so close to week 24, I can taste it. Just have to get through this next week of dissertation fun until maybe I can cut back on work and relax a bit. This week I talk about how exhausted I've been and also talk about the consequences of shunning your pg friends while you're going through IF.

22 weeks tomorrow. I can't believe I keep plugging along. This week I talk about how weird it is to answer the question "How are you feeling?" I also talk about hanging out with IF friends and going to my first mothers of multiples meeting. Had a really cool u/s yesterday complete with lots of 4D pics. The next 2 weeks are going to be crazy with work stuff but I'm just gunning towards February 1st: viability.

No major updates for me this week (all is going well) so I decided to do something fun instead. Enjoy the first game show dedicated to all things infertility!

Welcome to 2008. Let's hope this year brings us all what we want and have waitied so long for. I had a nice holiday with my family. Listen in this week as I talk about feeling overwhelmed with the shopping list for 2 babies and how I still can't bring myself to buy anything. My next OB appointment is tomorrow and I can't wait. Hoping for yet another peek in at the munchkins.

Sorry for the delay in posting. It's been so busy these last few weeks. But all is well with the babies. Had our level II u/s today and it was so amazing. They are getting so big. Everything looked great and as you can tell by the blinkie, we appear to have 1 of each in there. We honestly would be happy with any option but we are really excited to be expecting a girl and a boy. That means more shopping, right? This week I talk about how it's still weird to break the news to people and how I still feel a little like I don't fit in anywhere--not a fertile, not ttc still. Probably no podcast next week because my family will be here but I'll talk to everyone in 2008.

Another uneventful post--thank goodness. Just plowing along. I'm 16 weeks today. Time still seems to be moving really slowing but I feel like it should be picking up at any time now. I've been swamped with school, grading, and my dissertation. Although I know stress isn't the best thing for a pregnancy, it has been a distraction. Listen in today as I weigh in on the latest Newsweek article on infertility and diet (thanks Kimberly for posting the link). Just one more week until my next appointment.

I couldn't think of an image to post for this week. So we'll just go with blank. It's a busy time: finals and working on my dissertation. Still feeling pretty run down and queasy but all still seems to be going well. I';m another 2 weeks away from having another peek at the babies (hopefully) at my next appt. Then, in 3 weeks, it's the big gender scan. Listen in this week as I talk about how I'm still not showing much and how I'm still scared to tell people I'm the "p" word.